LGBTQ Nation asked our elder readers to tell us how life has changed for LGBTQ+ people in the past decades, and we got a lot of responses! Here’s one of them.

Reader Mona Liza told LGBTQ Nation that one of the big changes she has seen for LGBTQ+ people in her lifetime is increasing parental acceptance of their kids.

“It’s amazing to see how children, teenagers, and young adults today are more easily accepted by their parents, guardians, and others who care for them,” she wrote. “Looking back to 1974, I wish I had understood that what I was experiencing — loving a girl — was completely normal.”

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Mona Liza said that she “turned to drugs” when she was young, perhaps as a result of a lack of acceptance.

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She’s not alone. According to the Addiction Center, LGBTQ+ people are two to three times more likely to abuse substances than non-LGBTQ+ people. One in five gay or bi adults, according to the National LGBT Cancer Network, smokes. And, according to a 2022 Trevor Project study, over half of LGBTQ+ youth said they used alcohol in the previous year.

This is thought to be the result of minority stress, or the idea that minorities have to deal with discrimination and violence, which creates stress that they may try to self-medicate with alcohol, nicotine, or other drugs. LGBTQ+ people also have higher levels of stress, anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation.

Mona Liza said that she started using substances when she was in the seventh grade and “struggled with addiction to both drugs and alcohol until I was 28.” That’s when she decided to break free from the drugs, but she found it difficult to find and attend LGBTQ+ NA (Narcotics Anonymous) meetings.

“At the time, the broader NA community considered gay meetings to be ‘special interest’ groups,” she wrote. “It wasn’t until sometime in the 1990s that these meetings were officially recognized and sanctioned.”

Now Mona Liza has a message for LGBTQ+ young people: “Find someone to talk to instead of being mistreated or abused.”

“I’ve noticed that many teenagers today are able to openly hold hands with their partners, and it’s more accepted now. If you’re reading this, please know you don’t have to struggle alone — there are many resources and people who care about you.”

If you’re an LGBTQ+ elder and you want to share your story with us, please use this form.

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